By Lori Welch Brown

Do you remember the “21st night of September”?  Love was changing the minds of pretenders while chasin’ the clouds away…

Lucky for you, you don’t have to remember the 21st night of September, only the 20th…my birthday!  And, you’re welcome for that ear bug brought to you by Earth, Wind & Fire.  It’s one of my faves.

Speaking of faves, I do love September.  Not just because it’s my birthday month, but also mine and XXL’s wedding anniversary. We are celebrating lucky number eight this year.

Our hearts were ringin’

In the key that our souls were singin’

As we danced in the night, remember

How the stars stole the night away

I’m always grateful for things to celebrate, and try never to miss an opportunity to commemorate a milestone no matter how big or small. Celebrations equal memories, and memories with our loved ones are life’s currency. I am, however, amazed by how quickly time seems to be passing. Feels like just yesterday we were planning our wedding. Actually, it seems like just yesterday I was donning a cap and gown while walking across a stage to accept my diploma.

Traditional gifts for year eight are bronze and pottery. Bronze is formed by combing two metals—copper and tin—which is thought to be symbolic of the union of marriage. Will see what XXL comes up with.  I’m good as long as it’s not a copper plumbing pipe.

My love language is gifts, but XXL shows his love with acts of service. Cleaning my car or doing the dishes are his way of saying, “I love you.” All good stuff, and I remind him that nothing says love like diamonds. He also loves words of affirmation so I thought I’d take this opportunity to reinforce some things I love about him vs. the things that I remind him of on a daily basis that drive me bonkers.

I dated a lot of guys before I met XXL. He stood out because for the first time I found someone who actually saw me. XXL saw me from the inside out. Sure there was a physical attraction, but there was also a deeper, more nuanced attraction of loving and understanding each other’s character. He ‘got’ me in a way no one else before ever had.

My thoughts are with you

Holdin’ hands with your heart to see you

Only blue talk and love, remember

How we knew love was here to stay

From the beginning I knew he had a heart of gold. It was evident when he talked about his dog Buck or his son or his mom. Don’t tell anyone, but it was also evident when we watched Marley and Me together, and he cried like a baby.

XXL is passionate about life. He is most “happiest” when he’s operating anything with a motor, preferably a boat or playing his much beloved drums. He still dreams about being up on stage playing in front of a huge audience, and I keep telling him it’s not too late—dreams do come true. Or at least that’s what I’m banking on because I’m still excited about my book signing for the book I haven’t written yet.  When the tour bus pulls up for XXL, I won’t be surprised. He is beyond talented.

XXL has some crazy skills. The man can fix a leaky toilet, draw up plans—by hand—for a house, tie any knot, repair a diesel engine, build anything you can imagine, and that’s in a typical day. We call those XXL’s Big Day.

One of the things I love the most about XXL, however, is really quite selfish—it’s his desire for me to be happy. He is happiest when I am happy. He hates when I’m upset or sad and does everything within his power to turn things around. He has my back always, but not in a blind way. He also calls me out on my stuff which is important.

XXL is an enthusiastic supporter of me and my passions and purpose. Thanks to him, I’m taking art classes again, and writing every chance I get. Special thanks to him for all the great material he provides me without even realizing it, for instance when he told me he was ‘smutten’ with me. Umm, pretty sure you mean ‘smitten.’  I had ‘Forever Smutten’ engraved on his wedding band to ensure that XXLism wasn’t lost.

There are a lot of things about XXL that pluck my last nerve, but his good qualities outweigh his bad, at least on most days. On the days they don’t, I go shopping or out to lunch with friends or stab my XXL voodoo doll in the eyes. Kidding!

Make no mistake—marriage is hard. When I was single, I thought being single was hard. Now I know that they are both challenging in different ways. There are huge benefits to having a companion to share life’s moments with and for that I am very grateful to XXL.

It took me a long time to find my Mr. [Sometimes/But Frequently Wrong] Right. He may not be perfect, but he’s all mine.  And, hey—if you’re out there trying to find a lid for your pot, know that he/she is out there. If you’re like me, it may take a while, but it’s worth the wait.

So now, what to get XXL for an anniversary present? Maybe a penny for his thoughts about this article or a copper pot so at least he can say he has a pot to you-know-what in. Good thing gifts aren’t his thing. But, if you spot him around Old Town, feel free to direct him to King’s Jewelry for some help.

Even if September wasn’t my birthday month, I’d still love it just as much especially now that I have an anniversary to celebrate.

Now December

Found the love that we shared in September

Only blue talk and love, remember

The true love we share today

XOXO from my heart to yours.

About the Author: Lori is a local writer, painter and pet lover who loves to share her experiences and expertise with our readers. She has been penning a column for the OTC for over 20 years. Please follow Lori online on Medium for more missives like this.