By Cheryl Burns
Our eyes met. I knew. It was meant to be. My husband—he was there too—agreed.
I don’t believe in love at first sight—not with humans. But pets? Yes. Whisky Ruth was ours.
But this article isn’t about the moment you say “yes” to a new kitty (I’ve written about that before), it’s about what happens next. Specifically, it’s about bringing a new cat into a family with a resident feline. The first step is isolation: A separate room gives the new cat a sense of safety, and lets the resident adjust to the new sibling. Isolation isn’t easy, but it’s straightforward. Over a week or two, with the humans visiting both, you introduce the sibling’s sense-by-sense. But what happens next? How do you help the resident and new cat adjust? How do you make a space into a home? I’ll share my stories and some words from experts.
The First Second Cat
Sweet Potato Bailey Burns (or “SPBB” to save keystrokes) came home in August 2017. Smoky Tiggs Burns (RIP) hadn’t asked for a sister. But I’d known for years that we WOULD have a cat named Sweet Potato. The moment we met “Bailey” at King Street Cats, Sweet Potato was found.
Sweet Potato wasn’t good at isolation. She cried. Impressively. Our visits to her room aside, she “sang” nonstop. And maybe (definitely) it encouraged us to start the introduction a bit early. After a scent exchange, we used a baby gate so they could see each other while being kept separate. Or so we hoped. We quickly learned that “shelterweight” SPBB could wiggle her way through the poles. We tried but, despite my husband’s creative engineering attempts, SPBB would not be confined.
We let her loose.
Spoiler: It was too soon.
A day or two into the fully two-cat home, we found Smoky huddled in the sunroom, a place Sweet Potato hadn’t yet explored. She was trembling and breathing fast. It truly looked like a panic attack. We immediately closed the sunroom door and held her. We’d made a promise to them both—adoption is forever—but, at that moment, Smoky came first. We backtracked. We returned SPBB to isolation. We tolerated the heartbreaking serenade. We gave Smoky extra love and probably more attention than she wanted. We offered treats on opposite sides of the door. Smoky was slow to take them. We let her take her time. And as she calmed down and showed interest, we started again.
SPBB wanted a best friend. Smoky never really wanted a sister. They never curled up. But over time we noticed they were often in the same room and seemed to get comfort from each other. Like many humans, Smoky came to love her sister, even if she didn’t really LIKE her.
The Second Second Cat
Smoky passed in 2021—too soon, cancer sucks—and we’d toyed with the idea of another cat, but it wasn’t until we met Whisky Ruth in early 2026 that it was time. Two years old, likely in a shelter that whole time, she leaned all of her six pounds into our hands as we petted her through a cage.
Whisky iso-ed in the master bedroom, immediately claiming a laundry basket under the bed. I slept in that room. My husband slept in another room with Sweet Potato. Whisky never cried, but Sweet P spent a lot of time at that door, trying to peer under but clearly unsure. We’d crack the door to let them see each other. Sometimes SPBB hissed. We waited.
Release was gradual. Whisky was shy and skittish. But, she’s still part kitten and couldn’t resist a wand toy. We all visited. And then we separated. The door closed. SPBB got extra love from both of her people. Whisky sometimes slept on top of the bed instead of underneath. After a week of visits, we stopped closing the door. Whisky was the one who tried to make friends this time. SPBB was unsure. But, one day, SPBB kissed Whisky’s tiny head.
It hasn’t been linear. Whisky got sick. I’ll skip details, but it was serious—an infection crossed into her brain. She spent a night at the vet’s getting IV fluids and antibiotics. When she was home, she isolated herself. Our hearts ached. We realized how quickly she’d become family. Thankfully, she improved. As I write this, she’s still improving. She still likes to retreat, favoring a blue kitty tent in my office, but she’s does come out. And when she does, she’s ever-so-gradually working her way closer to her tolerant but still unsure sister. SPBB occasionally gives Whisky a (gentle!) swat, a warning she’s still adjusting. But, two months in, I think she’s falling in love too.
Some Thoughts and Where to Find Advice
So that’s my tale. My advice: Take it slow. Let them lead. Listen. And know they might not be best buds, but you can help them be family.
Also, do some reading. I think Jackson Galaxy’s “Eat, Play, Love” technique—essentially keeping both cats engaged in play in the same room for controlled periods of time until they develop a level of comfort—would have been a great option with Smoky and Sweet P.
Here are a few resources to get you started:
- American Humane Society, “Introducing Cats to Cats” (Feb. 20, 2026)
- Jackson Galaxy, “The Dos and Don’ts of Introducing Cats” (accessed May 15, 2026).
- Walter Sung, “How to Introduce Cats: Steps for a Successful Transition,” Chewy (Aug. 21, 2025).
About the Author: Cheryl Burns is a Senior Legal Editor and Subject Matter Expert with BARBRI, a legal education company. She lives in quiet Central Pennsylvania but is still a proud King Street Cats supporter (and not just because Sweet Potato Bailey Burns (f/k/a just Bailey) is an alum!).